The honeymoon phase is a blissful, carefree period in a couple’s relationship. Both partners are just getting to know each other and seem to find little fault with their significant other. Everything that new partner does—from how they eat to the stories they tell—feels charming and endearing. 

Of course, the honeymoon phase is exactly that: a phase. Eventually, it ends, leaving both partners needing to adjust to a new, more sustainable reality. For some couples, the honeymoon phase ends before they want it to while others don’t experience it at all. To help us understand this time period, and how to navigate it, we consulted licensed therapist Michelle Mouthis. “My biggest piece of advice is to enjoy the ride,” she says. “It really is such a special time for couples, no matter how short or long it lasts.” 

“For most people, the honeymoon phase lasts between six months and two years, but there is no hard and fast rule for how long you should be in this phase. No one can predict the future to see how long their honeymoon phase will last, so the most important thing to do is enjoy every minute of it and take it one day at a time.” 

 – Lauren Petters 

For most couples, the honeymoon phase occurs from the get-go. “It is the very beginning of a new relationship,” says Mouthis. “It’s when every part of the person you’re dating is fascinating, down to the minute details and weird quirks.” Perhaps the biggest reason the honeymoon phase is so exciting is that it’s too soon to know the partner’s full personality, with all its positives and negatives. “Everything about this person seems perfect because there hasn’t been enough time to experience their faults,” she adds. “And everyone has faults.” Some couples may experience the honeymoon phase after they make a big life step like moving in together or getting engaged. 

When Does the Honeymoon Phase Occur? 

The way to tell if you are in the honeymoon phase is to pay attention to your feelings and how you perceive your partner. “The biggest indicator of the honeymoon phase is if you feel the person in front of you is perfect,” says Mouthis. “You see them in a completely positive light, and you can’t imagine what their faults or incompatibilities could be. Everything is going right, and fun is happening over 90 percent of the time.” 

Some couples don’t have a honeymoon phase, or their honeymoon phase may be drawn out over time. Not only is there nothing to worry about if you don’t have a honeymoon phase; it may actually lead to a healthier relationship in the long term. 

The people who feel an instant spark with their partner might be blinded by giddiness and not see the full picture of the person with whom they are entering into a relationship. When that overwhelming chemistry is not present, it may lead to partners getting to know one another slowly and being more realistic about the person in front of them. “Relationships with these beginnings often turn into lasting love, with a honeymoon that gets woven in over time, rather than experiencing it all in the beginning and then having it fade away,” shares Mouthis.